


Jellydrabble

by Graymalkin



Category: No Fandom
Genre: Desperation, Exposure, Gen, Pee, Urination, female desperation, female urination, public urination
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-11
Updated: 2015-03-11
Packaged: 2018-03-17 09:33:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3524270
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Graymalkin/pseuds/Graymalkin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A jellyfish sting needs treatment.  Awkwardness ensues.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Jellydrabble

**Author's Note:**

> A drabble I wrote for Oreofic on Tumblr.

You wanna know why my friends call me "Nurse Joy"? Reason 1: my name. Reason 2: a video game I was born just too early to obsess over. Reason 3: The time I treated a jellyfish sting. 

I met Vi in a crisis (long story) and cemented our friendship in another. She took me on my first trip to the beach after I moved here. 

I was used to wearing baggy pants and hoodies. I felt uncomfortable wearing a bikini outdoors. Like those dreams you're giving a speech in your undies. I felt even more uncomfortable soon after I got there. Being able to move my hands around in pockets helped my bad habit of waiting too long to go potty. In my bikini I couldn't do anything like that without being obvious. Somebody stared at me and I realized I was doing a potty dance like a little girl without even knowing it. I curled up in the sand to keep the pressure on the right place without embarrassing myself. I needed the potty soon. Vi was my scout.

That was when I met Cal, her significant other whose significance varies. She led me to him instead of a potty. There seemed to be a lovely blue Christmas ornament on his right leg just above the knee. Box jellyfish. Agonizing sting. He took it well. Vi, on the other hand, was hysterical. 

She'd heard the cure was urine, knew I had plenty, and demanded I provide it. I declined (with lots of stuttering and awkwardness). I wasn't prepared for what happened next.

She reached down, grabbed my bikini bottom, and slid it down to my sandals. I could've died. I'd never even shown my tits to a man who wasn't my doctor. Now one had a scenic view of my hidden valley. There was no turning back. I assumed a lambdoidal position and flicked on the sprinkler. 

Malfunction. Something to do with the 30 people staring. 

I tried to ignore my audience. Looking in Cal's eyes made it worse. Looking at his inflamed wound wasn't any better. In between was the most engorged dingus I've ever seen. I've heard Brazilian wandering spider venom does that but I never knew jelly venom could. I just stood there straddling Cal's leg for a while, rocking and bobbing my body as I tried coax out a stream from my bashful bladder. It just didn't want to start.

Then something happened that fixed my stage fright like magic. Vi looked me straight in the face and yelled, "Piss on my boyfriend this minute or I'll never forgive you!"

I gave his leg a good soaking and then some. He moaned with relief. I moaned with relief. The crowd applauded. I kept spraying that leg. 

"You can stop now," Cal said, but I couldn't. He just had to crawl out of the way. There was a big wet crater in the sand before my flow finally cut off. 

I rebikinied myself and tried to forget any of it happened. Not easy when your friends think you're a hero. 

That's when they named me "Nurse Joy." Sexist, I think. If I had a wiener to whip out and cure Cal's sting I'd be called "Doctor." But the nickname was given with respect, and the experience gave us all a funny story to tell (usually without some of the details I'm telling you). We've been tight ever since (except during the times when Vi and Cal are dramatically broken up). Never had the heart to tell them urine does nothing to treat jelly stings. I gave Cal a shower of golden placebo.


End file.
